Homosexuals are constantly barraged with the "choice" question, and I find it offensive. I challenge every heterosexual to tell me the exact moment in their life when they consciously made the "choice" to be heterosexual? Calling homosexuality a choice is likening it to a fashion statement. "I chose to wear my homosexuality today."
Well, I don't wear homosexuality, I am a homosexual and am proud of who I am. My choice is to be proud of who I am, rather than living a life of lies.
Choices: To Be Or Not To Be
A Gay Opinion 7/10/00
by R.A. Melos
While at work today, myself and several coworkers had a long discussion about
my ex-lover A.K.A. the spineless jellyfish A.K.A. the person formerly known
as Mr. Right. During the conversation another gay man brought up the fact Mr.
Right chose not to be gay, and this is something I disagree with wholeheartedly.
I firmly believe we are born with our sexuality already intact, much like we
are born with heart, lungs, and brain. The choice is not whether or not we want
to be gay, we are gay. The choice is whether or not we want to repress our natural
inclinations, our natural desires, in order to make society happy.
As I see it, Mr. Right is naturally gay by birth. By choosing to live a heterosexual
lifestyle, he is repressing his natural sex drives in order to avoid a sense
of rejection by society. There are many gay men who are able to live a life
of repression. However, there are just as many gay men who choose to be happy
with who they are, accepting themselves as they are without the need to fit
into someone else's mold of who they should be; for they are secure in themselves.
The urge by society for the gay man to repress himself in order for those less
secure with their own sexuality is like society asking an artist not to create
because they themselves do not have the ability to be content with their own
lack of creativity. I fully believe a majority of heterosexual society is insecure
with their own lives in one way or another, and because of these insecurities
they urge homosexuals to repress their own sense of happiness and emotional
security.
All those closeted men, such as my former Mr. Right, may think or even claim
to have chosen a heterosexual lifestyle, and they are right, they have chosen
a lifestyle, but they did not choose their sexuality. They have chosen to repress
their individuality, their natural desires, their souls, but they have not chosen
not to be gay.
Being homosexual or heterosexual is a choice made for us by the universe itself,
and not something we can eliminate simply by telling ourselves we don't want
to be that way. The demand by heterosexuals for homosexuals to deny themselves
is the same as claiming the sky is green. Just because we say it is so doesn't
make it so.
Closeted men do make love to their wives, and live as heterosexuals in every
sense of the word, but it is an illusion, nothing more than a self imposed glamoury
which will eventually fade away like any facade. Their choice to repress themselves
leaves the subconscious the same options as a dam about to bust, for if the
natural desire is denied expression in one way it will find expression in another.
Some closeted men allow their desires to vent in cyberspace, through safe forms
of anonymous homosexual contact via the Internet. Conversing with others in
chat rooms with names like "curious m4m", or "Str8m4m",
allowing their natural urges to take over for a few brief moments before safely
repressing them back into the darker recesses of their own emotionally insecure
closet.
So, the choice is not whether or not to be gay, but whether or not to be happy?
My ex-lover chose, by his own words, "to live a lie". I choose to
live a happy truth.
How about the rest of you?